Pioneer Tears

My first visit to the Rogler Ranch I was eleven years old on a beloved drive in the Flint Hills alone with Dad. He began to slow along Highway 177 in front of the immaculate, white house right before a bridge near the bluff. It had huge two-story colonial columns and a gorgeous, well-kept stone... Continue Reading →

A Safe Yoga Home

I grab the yoga mat I inherited from Linda Esser and head out the door in her yoga pants. I only used them for lounging until now. It feels weird to be in public in lounge pants. The Heart Center Studio is my third ever Yoga class. It’s my first time to experience it as... Continue Reading →

WHAT in the WORLD am I doing!?

Why am I indoors on a gorgeously sunny spring Saturday? I could be hiking the Tallgrass Prairie but instead I am vacuuming the 1894 wood plank library sub-floor of an historic old house. WHY? I enjoy the mindlessness of the work and a special feeling of being a tiny part of the restoration of a grand... Continue Reading →

It Changes You — Dirty Kanza 200

I get some of the sweatiest, grimy handshakes of my lifetime, and it doesn't even bother me. It feels wonderful to be a part of something monumental in these riders’ lives. I get to hear comments to the Race Directors as riders finish and many say, “Thank you, this is the best course I’ve ever done.” One rider says, “This is the greatest achievement of my life!” I say, “Congratulations! Good work!” Time after time the riders thank me for my hard work, for being there, for being a Gravel Groupie. I mirror it back, “Thank you for your hard work. Without you we wouldn’t be here. You’re welcome.” I know they aren’t thanking me personally, because all I did was show up the day before the race. They are thanking the Race Directors, all the support staff, the entire community of Emporia, the surrounding communities that participate and all the ranchers whose front and back yards they travelled. Our contact creates a bond of sweaty gray-dirt gratitude and inspiration. So as a last minute volunteer, I am honored to receive a multitude of gratitude. It changes you.

Shining Light On The Darkness

Thank God for the lovely outpouring of birthday wishes on Thursday. I was still in a depressive funk, but I continued to go through the motions of celebrating in every way The Universe provided. I watched the negativity in my thoughts and allowed them to play out long enough to realize it is nothing I... Continue Reading →

Mindful Love After Love

Sunday I was inspired to look for a mindfulness video to give my new clients. I need to introduce them to observing their thoughts before we start. That is part of how my mind was set up to help me heal so fast when Linda first taught me to tap. I found several videos but... Continue Reading →

Don’t Hold Yourself Back

Watching Tiffany and Heather is great for a lot of people, but there will be some who cannot relate to their stories when they can relate to others or mine. My parents were mostly calm, loving, supportive and encouraging. My childhood traumas were not so dramatic. There was no alcohol or drugs, no death threats... Continue Reading →

Keep It Simple

Saturday I knew I wanted to pack and leave OKC as soon as possible so I did. I played with ideas in my head about what to do when I get home? I thought I still needed to sit with myself. As soon as I got home to an empty house all I knew is... Continue Reading →

My Internal Dialogue Creates My Life

Friday was wonderful and full of proof for how my outer world shifts when I change my internal dialogue and perspective. It can be as simple as changing clothes or looking through different glasses. When I change what I hold from lifelong patterns of belief and behavior and how I represent my world, everything and... Continue Reading →

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